My Rosary Boot Camp

I made a commitment at the beginning of lent to pray my daily Rosary.  At first it was first thing in the morning--then the time moved around as necessary when I found I ran out of time before I had little ones gathering around me pleading to be fed.  For the most part I have been faithful to this commitment--and the few times I have not prayed my rosary have been useful in how they highlight how effective 20 minutes of prayer can be!

One day in particular stands out.  It must have been a Monday because I was praying the Joyful Mysteries.
  This one evening the focus of my meditation became my parenting, and the goals I have as a mother.  The first mystery is The Annunciation.  The joy and trepidation of learning that I am going to be a mother, for the first time, or again, and again....that is always such a wonderful and terrible and exciting moment.  As I meditated on Mary's "fiat" I thought about, just as she had small idea of all the suffering and joy that was to come, I too have little idea of the lives that my children will bring me along on and a passenger as I watch and experience their choices from the sidelines.

The second mystery in the Visitation, when Mary rushes off to help Elizabeth, who is pregnant in her old age.  I reflected on how many deep and spiritual friendships I have with beautiful women of faith as a result of the children I have.  Library story time, Mom prayer groups, La Leche League--so many venues particular to mothers that have blessed me immensely.  We cannot mother in a vacuum, and the womanly friendships I have are essential to my growth in holiness and parenting.

The Nativity--such a profound mystery at any time of year, but especially now as we prepare to immerse ourselves liturgically in the "Word Made Flesh."  This mystery reminds me of the commingled and reflective relationship we have with the infant King.  I see the reflection of my deep love for my own babies, and have deep love for God welling up in me as I gaze upon the helpless babe in the manger.  But I am also reminded that God Himself loves me even more deeply and unconditionally.  To think and meditate on my own belovedness gives me the strength to turn again to the world, to my family especially, with the love that can only come from this deep knowledge of my own dignity and worth--and indeed every one's on earth!

When Mary Catherine was born in New Mexico part of her Baptism ceremony was to lay her on the alter and dedicate her though pray to Jesus and Mary.  That brief physical separation--stepping back and looking upon my own baby on the alter--burned in my heart the reality of she and I both being at the mercy of God.  I can do nothing without first offering everything to God.  Knowing that He is there guiding and strengthening me in my mothering.  It's not all roses, but with prayer I can persevere in offering myself and my children, repeatedly, to Our Lord.

Any parent who has temporarily, or permanently lost a child knows what Mary and Joseph felt as they searched for their boy.  The Finding of Jesus in the temple reminds me not only of the joy of once again hugging the lost child, but also of the need for me to find the child Jesus every day of my life.  And this seeking and finding I prayerfully pass on to my own children. The childhood faith is so easy to nurture.  They are genuinely seeking and finding Jesus every day.  But as they grow I know they will have to make their own adult decision to find and follow Christ.  All I can hope to do is to be an example, offer other examples of faith in the people we spend time with, and pray pray pray!

And so my Rosary has blessed me.  Thank you Jesus, and Mother Mary!

An Autumn Adventure

On voting day the 5 youngers and I donned our blaze orange and walked the mile and a half down to our village center.  We played at the river [ark, stopped at the swimming hole to write letters, went to the town office to vote and play with the toy basket, then to the post office to pick up a BIG BOX from Nana and mail the letters we had just written.  What an adventure! 

Of course, then we had to walk back home!  Uphill!!  Blaise fell asleep.  The box moved from John Henry's shoulder, to Thalia's head, then her shoulder, then to in between Blaise and Weggie on the stroller.  Back on our little road it was just on top of Blaise, as Weggie decided (after the BIG HILL) that he could run around with his brothers!

The whole event took 3 hours.  Boy was it worth it!! 

I LOve This Poem

Spring and Fall


to a young child

MÁRGARÉT, áre you gríeving
Over Goldengrove unleaving?
Leáves, líke the things of man, you
With your fresh thoughts care for, can you?
Áh! ás the heart grows older 5
It will come to such sights colder
By and by, nor spare a sigh
Though worlds of wanwood leafmeal lie;
And yet you wíll weep and know why.
Now no matter, child, the name: 10
Sórrow’s spríngs áre the same.
Nor mouth had, no nor mind, expressed
What heart heard of, ghost guessed:
It ís the blight man was born for,
It is Margaret you mourn for.

A Moment

Last night we had a moment of timeless joy around the dinner table. It was also a great illustration of what happens when two graduates of St. John's College get married and decide to homeschool.

This is us around the kitchen table eating cookies--but you get the idea...

We cracked out the Herodotus. AH!! Book 6 paragraphs 94-104. I was reading aloud, and stopping frequently to discuss who was leading the Persians on the trek down to Athens. John had a map of ancient Greece handy. Thalia had her "Famous Men of Greece" out for cross referencing all the personages of note.

It was so much fun!!! I hope SOMEONE among our offspring go to SJC just for the fun of re-reading these Great Books!!

(Just so you don't think it's all perfect, the resident teen asked "WHY are we reading this?" in a very put off tone. She soon left the room to browse facebook while we were in nerdy bliss...)

Making a beautiful home

I'm busy unpacking, but want to share bits of my successes. (and Sondra's, since she was doing a lot of the design work yesterday!)




Here is our reading/prayer nook in our bedroom. Don't you just want to sit and relax over the Bible, or the latest Atlantic, or Runner's World?!


This is the dining room just before dinner last night. NB the sideboard with food. We need to loose the ladder and vacuum, but the candles add ambience, no? Nice books too!

This was Sondra's Baby--artfully placed pitchers above the cupboards. She forced me to give up the big black hole garbage can that I was really enjoying for the more understated kitchen garbage can--oh well. It does look better.

And this is what happens when you are so busy unpacking that you leave an open jam jar on the table with a toddler.

Hey, Peter

Blaise: Come over here! My mom has this cupboard, and if we open it there are treats inside!

P: Really? Let's see. OOO here is that little brown bottle. It smells good, but Eli says it tastes yucky! What's in this bag?

B: Sand! White sand!! Let's poor it out and play in it.

P: My hands are sandy, I hate that--I'll lick them WOW!! This sand tastes GREAT!!!

B: You're right!! Be really really quiet. The Mom's will never know! Just keep licking!

Because I nee Distraction,

And storage. . .
My new brainchild idea. .
I have some college-ish interior design issues--the biggie is milk crates. I have at least a dozen holding books, a few more holding sewing fabric, several holding shoes in the mudroom, and a couple of empties lying around just in case.

But milk crates are not beautiful, and I desire beauty in my new house. I also need to maintain a semblance of order on a tight budget.
So I'm thinking of combining some creative storage ideas Like this


















With a not too hard sewing project like this.

I'd use a sturdy canvas for the shoe bound crates, something prettier but still strong for the books. Voila! Form and function!

Building Stress, and Building Relationships

My energies are taken up these day with more than just running a house of 8 with love and grace. We have a bit more than 4 weeks to get the house fully built and ready for the Bank to inspect it and say, yes, indeed, we may move in and begin paying the mortgage.

In God's infinite wisdom, He is asking John and I to put a bit more of ourselves into the job than we had anticipated when we began this journey. So I'm now lurking the Maine craigslist and the re-store looking for deals on appliances, kitchen cabinets, and other necessaries. I'm not low on cash, I'm an environmentalist!! Re-using someone else's stuff is really good for our carbon footprint, dontchknow!?

As I examine my conscious at the end of the day, I now spend more time distracted by "Are my beams sanded? are the walls painted?" than more appropriate questions about how I have impacted others, and brought a bit more love into the world.

At its worst this stress comes out sideways towards those I love most as impatience, inability to deal with the normal challenges of motherhood, and frankly, a messy house.

At its' best these times of extra effort show me more clearly who I am, and who those around me are. The husband who understands and does dinner dishes in the morning. The friends who give up beautiful summer days to work with paint, hammers, and wood. And the medium and big children who bring wood scraps to the burn pile, set the floor nails, put up stair banisters, and cut down miles of blackberry brambles. These are people I love, and I see clearly through their actions that they love me.

And within all of this I see and recognize the person closest to my soul. He loves me so much that he knows the challenges that will strengthen me, and the graces and consolations I will need to get through those challenges and come closer to heaven. I am so glad tomorrow is First Friday. I have a date at 11 that I would not miss for the world--or for my house!

Borrowed From the Ether

I Corinthians 13 for Home-schooling Moms*



Though I teach with the very best skills,

But do not have love,

I am just drawing attention to myself.

And if I have experience, and knowledge of all the best techniques, and test results proving my effectiveness

But do not have love,

I am wasting my time.

And if I work hard, sacrificing all my money, my time and my energy

But do not have love,

It adds up to nothing.



The loving teacher is patient with her children, allowing them to learn according to their God-given temperaments and developmental rates.

She is kind, treating her children respectfully.

She does not compare herself with others.

She does not brag about her accomplishments and is not smug about teaching her own children.

She does not try to be like anyone else, but acts appropriate to the way God made her.

She is not irritable and pushy and insistent upon making her children fit into her lesson plans.

She is more concerned with promoting truth and beauty than with criticizing those who don’t.

She perseveres in developing her own character, believing that God’s ways are always best. She is not a quitter.

Love never fails.



If there are creative ideas, they will be replaced.

If there are great curricula, they will be superseded.

If there are effective techniques they will be improved.

All that we know now is only a part.

Only later will God reveal education at its best.

When I was a child, I had unrealistic expectations.

As an adult, I know better.

Now abideth faith, hope and love.

But the greatest of these is love.



*And Dads

Easter !!!!

Mary Catherine's amazing cupcakes.

Lamb, garlic, herb roll-up! YUM.

Saturday night egg dying.

Crafty eggs.

Finished crafty eggs--onion skins and herbs.

Finished Bunnies! (midnight).

Bunny hand-out! This is before Weggie rejected his and we traded with Blaise, who didn't care either way.

Bunnies and babies--the teenager, and teenager's bunny are missing.

Easily pleased John--MC is trying to give him bunny ears, but she is too short. HAHA!

A whole new world, with chocolate in it!

YUM YUM.

Loving the baskets--this is at Lisa's house BTW.



Thaddeus on the egg hunt.

Egg hunt.

Brisk hunting!

A Fruitful Lent Indeed

Any Catholic knows how dagerous it is to pray for what you want. My prayer for a fruitful has resulted in many opportunities to suffer in small yet exquisetly painful ways. Thanks Lord! Even though the beans didn't get dyed purple (still hoping to get to that. . .), and the toothpick thorns all got stuck in the crown (sorry Jesus, no relief at that end), my goal of having a 'quiet home' in order to better hear the voice of Jesus has happened. I think the children notice. No radio in the car means we pray a lot more rosaries, and sing a lot more hymns. No facebook/radio/videos means am sometimes left wondering what to do without all my usual distractions. Oh right. Pray!! I could do more journaling for sure, but the general sense of quietude, reflectedness, and presence with my children has been a true blessing. Let see if I can keep it up past Easter. This afternoon for a few moments I had the 3 youngest boys rolling chapatis with me. Yes, Blaise too had his own rolling pin, flour, and ball of dough. Arveragus was good for about 1 1/2 chapatis. Thaddeus was the workhorse, finishing very close to half of the chapatis with me. The beans and rice fast is spiced up considerably by daal and chapatis--feels more like a feast even though it is vegetarian and simple. The meal plan has also quieted down my life. Beans and rice every night but Sunday, and oatmeal 3 mornings a week. Lunch is usually leftover dinner. I am not wasting a lot of energy on meal plans these days! I feel like a hermit! Except for the kids, and the husband, and the girlfriends on the phone--but other than those--I am having a very monastic, lovely lent.

NFP

Wanna take a class? Go here and click on learn/register. Search for a class in Maine---Look!! We're famous!!

TWT: Keeping a positive attitude

Hey ladies! You'll be excited to hear that today is a Total Woman Tuesday! This Tuesday is all about keeping a positive attitude. Let's face the facts: no one has a perfect life, a perfect day, a perfect marriage or a perfect home. It's so easy to get caught up in all of the negative (believe me, I sure can!), but when we do, we just make everything worse. So today, focus on the positive. When you're stuck in traffic, listen to some of your favorite music, take some time to relax or spend some time in prayer. When you're frustrated with your husband or children, focus on what you love about them (and tell them about it). Take joy in your responsibilities as a woman, a wife or a mother. Positivity is so good for the soul. Enjoy your Tuesday! Stay positive!

Some New Orleans Music and Little Cousins

First Unifom

This afternoon I discovered a new Lenten sacrifice worthy of time off purgatory. I had to sew emblems and Pack Numbers onto John Henry's new Webelo's uniform. Sounds easy. I thought it would be easy. But one badge was too low for the numbers to fit between it and the pocket. Re-do. One number was crooked. Re-do. One is still too high--will re-do at a later date.

Stitch. Stitch. Stitch. Ouch!

After a while--when I got into the groove I was able to reflect on what I was doing. Sewing on the uniform of a 9 year old. What other uniform will this child wear as he grows? The casual non-specific uniform of a college student in the 2020's? A military uniform? The uniform of a religious order or of the priesthood? Perhaps this is the first in a long line.

But I don't ever meditate on the future for too long. I know that my own daydreams of my children's future will have little impact on their choices. Also, I don't know Young Man John Henry. I know this John Henry and want to enjoy every moment that we have together. This affectionate, intelligent, curious, creative, boy-ish boy. Qualities that are common to almost every child, and yet he is unique and precious to me. The boy with the splitting smile, the crinkly eyes.

So I sewed my love for him with each stitch. In the end it is appropriate that one thread is loose, one badge a bit high, one letter a bit crooked. Regardless of my love for all of my children, it is imperfect. I hope I can point them towards the only perfect love available to them. Remind them that they have a perfect Mother in Mary, and the infinite well of God's Love.

Stitch. Stitch. Ouch! That is Marriage and family in a nutshell, isn't it?

Beginning a bit Late

But better late than never! Spending almost the whole first week of Lent in New Orleans was not necessaarily the best beginning to fasting and repentance. . . more like an exerciese in humility at my lack of self-control. But in my defence. . .EVERYONE was eating a lot!!

But now I'm back home, the laundry is done, the children back in the homeschooling schedule, and I am focused on getting my spiritual journey towards Good Friday on the right track. I have found this blog through Minnesota Mom. Today I think I'll splurge on a big journal and get going! It will be a profitable Lent if only I keep following the promptings of the spirit!

It was a battle to get to Stations of the Cross last night. An ugly, sin filled battle. But I got there, and felt the truth in both my own sinfulness, and God's Mercy. "Take up your cross and follow me" is a profound statement to a struggling, tired mother of many. Ok Lord, if you say so!

Of An Evening

Winter break, and our New Orleans study is nearing it's end. We had a wonderful snow day today. A perfect day for wrapping up the loose ends of homeschooling (just some Latin left for tomorrow), and cleaning 3/4 of the 100 lbs of shrimp we bought yesterday.

This evening I had grace enough to take a few steps back clearly see how much fun, and how skilled Mary Catherine is. She put together a gourmet dinner for 13 people. Shrimp scampi, salad, and beignet's. Competent, intelligent, resourceful. It was one of those times when all the annoyances, big and small, melt away in the beauty of the young woman she is becoming.

What we Are. . .

reading.
Listening too.
Watching.
I still need to get some good resources for exploring the connection between our Maine Acadians and the Louisiana Cajuns.
Later this week I'll be cooking this, and this. Party on Friday afternoon. Art Cards with a New Orleans/Mardi Gras theme, and some yummy food!

New Cell number

I hve taken a step away from Oregon. I have traded in the 503 number for a local number. This way my kids can call me from the high school and theatre phones. Sigh! Goodbye Portland, 3 years later.

Call my home # to get my new cell #.

For My Local Parenting Friends

Tuesday, Feb. 15 Laura Gauld will present The Biggest Job We’ll Ever Have, her national parenting workshop. Laura Gauld is the Head of School at the Hyde School in Connecticutt and is also Executive Director for part of the program at Hyde in Bath, Maine. She's well-respected presenter (solid teaching, but not preachy), teacher and parent. She has a particularly broad experience with teenagers.

What will she discuss?
• Allowing your child to struggle.
• How to balance achievement and attitude.
• How to help your child reach their highest potential.
• When truth is more important than harmony
• some practical suggestions for simple family activites that help build family bonds

Her presentation will be followed by a time for questions.

This workshop will be extremenly valuable as your son/daughter enters high school. The suggestions presented by Laura Gauld will give you and your child practical tools for decision making during the challenging four years ahead.

The Biggest Job will be 7 - 9 pm at St. Charles Church Hall, 132 McKeen St., Brunswick. Although the workshop has been planned especially with you in mind, it is open to the public and free of charge. Please feel free to invite other parents and educators.

I hope to see you all on Feb 15.

Nicholas' First Sleep Over

Latin Mass

Here is someone else's story of how she and her family came to the Latin Mass. Our story is different--but similar.

Foibles to Keep Me on My Toes

If you know me at all you know that I am always planning disaster in order to feel prepared/in control. I even try to plan when I won't be in control, so I can at least be in control of my loss of control. I think this started when I was 6 or 7 and I would stay up waiting for my Mom to come home from a night out. I would watch all the cars coming down the street and plan out the ways she could die. That way she wouldn't die, because what are the chances I would think of the way she would die on the very night it happened, right?


One of my new favorite songs has these lyrics: " I am a woman who worries about closet space, and someday I'll be dead. I have a strong imagination. I let it wander where it will."


So last week I was faced with a situation.


Thaddeus.





He had somehow managed to get his legs into the sleeves of his upside down, backwards, winter jacket. One leg was through his seat belt, and the seat belt went partway down the sleeve. He could neither straighten his legs, stand up, nor pull the sleeves off his legs. It was not a pretty sight.



Objectively this is not too big a deal.

My brain perceived the scene this way; EMERGENCY. TRAPPED. CAR.. DEATH SOON. GET HIM OUT.



In my raving panic I grabbed a ballpoint pen and started to hack my way through his coat. You have no idea the power of a scared mother. You have no idea the incredulous looks from sane children as their mother works on saving the life of someone in no danger at all.


HACK HACK TEAR RIP.


I couldn't do it. The zipper was too much. Also, a small voice in my head was starting to question the necessity of my extreme action. I left him there. I failed. If we had been falling into a lake I would not have saved him. Since we were only stopping at the construction site, it wasn't too bad. But in my reptilian brain I had definitely failed.


While we were inside, Thaddeus walked in. No jacket.


"Mom. You wrecked my coat."


uh. yeah. but I was trying to save you life. Forget it. I'm sorry. I'll fix the coat.


One of my morning prayers says to Jesus "I know you are with me in every emergency of my life, especially in the emergency of my death."


At this point I don't think I'll perceive my death as an emergency. Blessed rest and utter surrender. Until then I'll continue planning and preparing and saving the lives of hapless Eddyblouins everywhere!
And someday I'll be dead.

Wordless Saturday, Cause Wednesday was too busy!

On Sunday night, after the raucous party was over, we all reminisced about the day John Henry was born. It was actually DAYS, since my water had broken, and re-sealed, a week before, and I kept everyone up till 2 am the night before, sure I was about to give birth any minute!! HAHA! After some sleep, and a quiet day at home alone, then with John, the gang came back and he finally arrived a bit after 6 pm. Beautiful Big Strong baby boy!! One of the few babies that we just KNEW the gender of before birth--there was no mistaking his boy-ness from very early on in the pregnancy!

And so it continues--my first boy has been growning up surrounded by loving sisters and brothers. He's less a general member of the pack now, and more of a leader (when Thalia lets him, anyway!). At his best moments he is a loving, patient, sensitive, brave guide to his siblings.

And Quinn too! It was funny to watch Quinn helping John Henry (who is not quite a fluent reader yet) read his birthday cards. I resisted the urge to tell him to stop, because John Henry didn't mind, and Quinn was offering his own services very lovingly. It all goes by so fast, I am cherishing every moment of these childhood years, and working on not rushing through, smoothing over, and just plane missing the moment because the next one is coming too fast! I love John Henry! What a wonderful 9 year old!!

Thaddeus' Story

His assignment was to put the Goya paintings in any order and tell a story:

There were two boys and a dog lost in the desert in Egypt.



The dog died and they were very thirsty and they blew up the dog baldder [we have done this with pig bladders].

They were lost till they grew up and they came to a bayou and got to drink water [New Oleans study is going on--can you tell?]

Finally they got to America and got married [presumably to women, not each other].